[daz1977]

whats the worst employee you have employed, i had a lad work for me for about 3 days, forgot to do half the windows, kept losing poles and buckets and cut his fingers open on a blade, he put in his pocket, so he didnt lose it and forgot it was there

come on we could all do with a laugh

[1wayno]

me lol

[martinsadie]

the wife wouldnt shut up about being cold so i gave her the bus fare and sent her home 

[dazmond]

my brother!2 days and i sacked him!about 12 yrs ago!he repeatedly kept missing windows out thinking no one would notice!he was only cleaning downstairs!!NEVER MIX FAMILY,FRIENDS AND BUSINESS!!NEVER AGAIN!!

[d.ward]

i had a lad working with me when i started cleaning a few months ago. He was a mates mate who had suppossed to have cleaned windows before. He was forgetful, stupid and had no spacial awareness.

Have you shut the gate? oh i forgot
Did you whipe the sills? i forgot il do them now
Did you get the bucket? ive left it in thingys yard

he hit a few customers windows with my ladder and on four of them occassions put the ladder over his shoulder and turned around nearly taking my head off . If i wasnt so alert id have had half an head.

Cant say how releaved i am that im wfp next year !!!

[jonnyald]

when i was a mechanic i had a new lad,on his very first morning he dislocated his knee, just walking round the back of the workshop! then cheerfully told me this often happened as he had messed up his knee doing speedway riding .   from that day on ,he wasnt allowed to bend down which hindered working on cars somewhat . he lasted 2 years in the end 

[mci services]

my son i sent him home after the first week and told him never to work with me again. he liked to announce in his loudest voice in customers garden that the place was minging and whats the point doing the windows when the insides were mockit. and about another thousand things :

[rolo123]

Had a lad work for me for 3 weeks,was always late,on his last week his mum had fallen down the stairs,so he had to look after her,next day had to help his dad move,worked one day,next day could not work had his wisdon teeth out,next day off took the dog to the vets,he had the check to ask me for his job back at xmas,saying the jobcentre had asked to call me,he also said he liked nothing more than staying at home all day watching tv with his family,and not working.unbeliveable.

[Steve CM]

had a guy that thought all windows were round and enjoyed watching himself doing swirly patterns with wfp on the glass pane.

Also had a guy that thought it was exceptable to pee in a customers garden.

both were swiftly moved on.

[AuRavelling79]

In a previous life running an office equipment firm we employed a "saleswoman" to sell word processing equipment. She claimed she was a widow whose husband had died of a brain tumour - which I took at face value until the next guy we employed told me that she was just a nut case who would spin any story to get sympathy and that her husband had left her when she "became a white witch".

Anyway, two months later she's not selling much and seems to disappear from time to time and we think she is pulling a fast one and we kindly but firmly tell her she needs to sell something substantial this month or we'll have to part company.

Later that week she comes in to the office leans against my office door in a "coming over all faint" kind of way and tells me she's been diagnosed with terminal cancer.

Cutting the story down we contacted her GP as the concerned employers we were and the doc. tells us he is mightily amazed that he doesn't know about this although he cannot say anything officially due to confidentiality.

Next day she says she has to go to Southampton hospital on a certain day for a check up for her cancer and we give her the day off but get a mate to phone her and ask if she can give him some word processor training on a cash in hand basis to which she agrees to do in Bristol at precisely the time she is supposed to be in Southampton hospital.

So she's busted and we sack her and ask for her car keys and she says "aren't you going to give me a lift home?"

"Errr no ..." Says my co-director

She comes back with - "I'm a witch - I'm going to put a spell on you!"

So my fellow director says:- "If you're a witch then why don't you go home on your broomstick? There's the door love, or do you prefer the window? Bye bye!"

[[GQC] Tim]

She comes back with - "I'm a witch - I'm going to put a spell on you!"

So my fellow director says:- "If you're a witch then why don't you go home on your broomstick? There's the door love, or do you prefer the window? Bye bye!"

               

That's such a good one.

[Mist A Bit]

by best friend at the time lasted 1 day, he got so tired he could hardly move, he decided to go back to his office job

[Dean Taberner]

Also had a guy that thought it was exceptable to pee in a customers garden

Dont we all do that?

[krave]

Also had a guy that thought it was exceptable to pee in a customers garden

Dont we all do that?

Was there not a video up on here about 6 months ago of the cleaner taking a crap into a paper bag or something at a customers house. Lol.

[Pureandclean]

Had a polish lad that had a habit of falling off his ladder, fell off 3 times on to a shed roof and the customer said to him, it's a good job I put that shed there !
1st day he had a company van, he wrote it off, when rear view mirror fell off and he bent down to pick it up and ran it up a telegraph pole.
rang up at 9.00pm on a friday night after collecting to tell me van had stopped not long after he had filled it up.....you guessed it, he had put diesel in and it was petrol engined.
He was a member of the ATC and after his first opportunity of flight training, his instructor after several minutes of calming himself down, informed him that he did not have any natural ability to fly planes.
As he found it difficult to wake up in time, he used to have a mars bar wrapped in dry bread for his breakfast, and one day asked me if I could ask one of the customers if he could use the toilet. After he had finished the lady asked me if he was unwell, and not to ask again.
Apart from that he was a hard worker.   : :

[brianmc]

family member.....back pack was too heavy for him,so i employed his son to carry it for him(i know,i know),then decided ,enough was enough.......funny thing is,he works or himself now and carries the back pack all day,without any problems...i must get the MUG tattoo removed from my forehead

[peter holley]

going back about 14 years ago...we had finished cleaning, so Iasked the lad to put the ladders back on the roof  (meaning roof rack ),whilst I collected etc....Anyhow I collected an came back to find him sheepiishly staring up at the roofs of the houses all confused     he then asked me "which roof do you want me to put the ladders on "

[telboy]

the wife wouldnt shut up about being cold so i gave her the bus fare and sent her home 

Classic Stan

[marc]

ive had one or two over the years but the worst has to be when you find out that one is light fingered and tapping up ya customers when he made out he was ya mate but as long as you learn from it , fingers crossed the guys i have at moment are blinding apart from the fact i had 2 broken poles from 3 guys working on friday but these things happen lol