[Doctor Carpet (Ret'd)]

AS mentioned elsewhere there are certain truisms which seem to hold good. Some are good general life laws and some could be exclusive only to carpet cleaners.

Here are some to kick off with.

You will always run out of clean water with only 2 square yards of carpet left to rinse/extract.

THe chance of a call-back is directly proportional to the further distance that the custy lives away from you.

The waste tank will trip the ball valve when you only have two square yards of carpet left to rinse/extract.

More general ones include the first law of motoring which states that the first fly to hit a clean windscreen will always land directly in front of the driver's eyes.

Or Murphy's Law which states that "anything that can go wrong will go wrong".

Mind you I've heard that there is an amendment to this law which states that "Murphy was an optimist"

[M.Acorn]

Yes very true ,ran out of fluid yesterday with about 2 feet left to clean !

[garyj]

The dirtier and trashed the carpet the more the customer expects it to come up like new.

The bigger and posher the house the less they expect to pay.

The "can you just do this while you are here" piece of carpet will be the one that gives you the most hassle.

[John Milnes]

The lounge carpet looks fanastic, but it make the diner look dirty now....can you do that as well?

After you have meticulously put all you'r gear away!

[Susan Dean (1stclean)]

after unwideing two legths of pipe off the hose reel u fine your a foot short ! so it anthor fifthy foot for northing

[John Gregory]

Susan you are bang on there , That happens every day


john

[Steve Barnett (Carpet Care Plus)]

When you do a deal for cash and when you have packed everything away they ask "who do I make the cheque to" !

[Karl Wildey]

the minute you've left the office/house the phone rings non stop and no one leaves a message, where as the pervious day when you were in all day no one rang.

Something goes wrong when you are the furthest from home, never when you are working around the corner.

When you are totally booked up, one of your best clients wants a job done urgently.

When you overpriced a job cos you don't want it, its yours

[Neil Williams]

The...
When they say it's 14 foot by 12 expect it to actually be 23 by 14 
When they say it's a 2 seater sofa which when you see it is big enough for 5 people to sit comfortably on it.
When they say no I haven't put anything on the stains, so why is it foaming up like b-ggery
When you're one hour into a 5 bed mansion and they chirp up with how much longer do you think you'll be as I have to go out at 11-30 and don't want to leave the house unattended