[cornwallwindows]

Went to clean a bungalow today that I'd acquired when I bought a round, haven't changed the prices yet!
When I turned up first thing she said was:

"where have you been?"
Me, "sorry I've been on holiday"
"Well what about my windows?"
"Sorry, I haven't been on a holiday in about 5 years"
"Well it's not good enough, I need my windows cleaning!"
"Well I'm here now"
"Don't forget to clean the sills, the last one always did."
"I always do Madam"
"While your here can you clean my conservatory?"
"Yes but I'll have to charge you a bit more"
"But I thought the £8 I pay you covers it?"
"I am sorry but I can't do 9 windows, 4 skylights and a conservatory for £8"
"Well, I'm a pensioner and you shouldn't be going on holidays in the summer!"
"Yes and I have bills to pay" (probably more than her!)
"Well leave it then"
"No problem, bye"

They intimidate me more than dodgy Dave with his Doberman!!

[Tom White]

I had a fearsome one, an elderly German lady, who was just mental.  If it wasn't the fact that I thought she was mental, I'd've dumped her long ago.

She's dead now.

[Johnny B]

She probably got upset because you didn't doff your cap, bow and go on one knee, asking if you could please clean her windows, skylights and conservatory and be ever so grateful if she could see her way clear to rewarding you for the privilege with a generous gift not exceeding £8.00. Said gift would be forfeited upon suspicion of it being earmarked for such hedonistic persuits as a holiday.

John  

[cornwallwindows]

"Whatever you do, do not mention ze war!"

Did you dump her or did she snuff it before?!

This one's a scary Cornish bird. Watching my back for flying pasties!

[cornwallwindows]

She probably got upset because you didn't doff your cap, bow and go on one knee, asking if you could please clean her windows, skylights and conservatory and be ever so grateful if she could see her way clear to rewarding you for the privilege with a generous gift not exceeding £8.00. Said gift would be forfeited upon suspicion of it being earmarked for such hedonistic persuits as a holiday.

John  

Never been made to feel so damn guilty! I nearly mentioned that fact that my Gran died and that was the reason that could afford to go (she left a bit of dosh). So just smiled, jumped in her van and ran over her 3 legged cat while giving her the finger.

[Pete Thompson]

I allow customers 30 seconds of whinging time PER YEAR.

If they exceed it they are instantly dumped, or have their prices increased by such a ridiculous amount that
A) they cancel
B) they agree and I'm laughing all the way to the bank, with the extra cash as compensation for their negative energy that I've had to endure.

One of the best things about window cleaning is that you don't have to put with idiots.  As soon as idiotic behavior begins, you have to nip it in the bud.  Otherwise they start to think they are the boss and demand all sorts of stupid things, like respect.

[LT carpet cleaning]

I allow customers 30 seconds of whinging time PER YEAR.

If they exceed it they are instantly dumped, or have their prices increased by such a ridiculous amount that
A) they cancel
B) they agree and I'm laughing all the way to the bank, with the extra cash as compensation for their negative energy that I've had to endure.

One of the best things about window cleaning is that you don't have to put with idiots.  As soon as idiotic behavior begins, you have to nip it in the bud.  Otherwise they start to think they are the boss and demand all sorts of stupid things, like respect.

Of course their the boss 
You honestly think you are doing THEM the favor?

[Johnny B]

She probably got upset because you didn't doff your cap, bow and go on one knee, asking if you could please clean her windows, skylights and conservatory and be ever so grateful if she could see her way clear to rewarding you for the privilege with a generous gift not exceeding £8.00. Said gift would be forfeited upon suspicion of it being earmarked for such hedonistic persuits as a holiday.

John  

Never been made to feel so damn guilty! I nearly mentioned that fact that my Gran died and that was the reason that could afford to go (she left a bit of dosh). So just smiled, jumped in her van and ran over her 3 legged cat while giving her the finger.

How long have you been in business? If relatively new, be prepared to spend the first 2 or 3 years sorting out the dross. Once you have got through this and your good reputation starts to grow, you will find that things will get easier. You will still get the odd numpty, but these will soon become history as a higher proportion of good genuine customers find their way to you.

Best wishes,
John

[gary999]

My pensioners are the best customers I have always pay on time
always friendly and thankyou for the service,always tip at xmas
plus I get loads of cakes  and home made jams and other preserves

Ive got one old dear who has a jar of home made  jam and a sponge
cake ready for me every six weeks when I clean her windows

[steven ainger]

You should of said
" everybody needs a holiday " i hear alot of your generation are going to Switzerland, you should try it !!!! Lol

[PoleKing]

My pensioners are the best customers I have always pay on time
always friendly and thankyou for the service,always tip at xmas
plus I get loads of cakes  and home made jams and other preserves

Ive got one old dear who has a jar of home made  jam and a sponge
cake ready for me every six weeks when I clean her windows

Thought you were going every day by the size of ya!

[gary999]

My pensioners are the best customers I have always pay on time
always friendly and thankyou for the service,always tip at xmas
plus I get loads of cakes  and home made jams and other preserves

Ive got one old dear who has a jar of home made  jam and a sponge
cake ready for me every six weeks when I clean her windows

Thought you were going every day by the size of ya!

What took you so long

[PoleKing]

My pensioners are the best customers I have always pay on time
always friendly and thankyou for the service,always tip at xmas
plus I get loads of cakes  and home made jams and other preserves

Ive got one old dear who has a jar of home made  jam and a sponge
cake ready for me every six weeks when I clean her windows

Thought you were going every day by the size of ya!

What took you so long

Only just got in.
Went out late as had to oversee the contractors at home.

[8weekly]

I allow customers 30 seconds of whinging time PER YEAR.

If they exceed it they are instantly dumped, or have their prices increased by such a ridiculous amount that
A) they cancel
B) they agree and I'm laughing all the way to the bank, with the extra cash as compensation for their negative energy that I've had to endure.

One of the best things about window cleaning is that you don't have to put with idiots.  As soon as idiotic behavior begins, you have to nip it in the bud.  Otherwise they start to think they are the boss and demand all sorts of stupid things, like respect.

Of course their the boss 
You honestly think you are doing THEM the favor?

No, they are the customer.

[SeanK]

Your first mistake was to say sorry for being on holiday.
Your second was to try and justify it by saying its your first in 5 years.
Your final mistake was to allow her to keep complaining after you had explained the situation.
Window cleaning can be soul destroying enough at times without having to put up with customers like that.

[LT carpet cleaning]

I allow customers 30 seconds of whinging time PER YEAR.

If they exceed it they are instantly dumped, or have their prices increased by such a ridiculous amount that
A) they cancel
B) they agree and I'm laughing all the way to the bank, with the extra cash as compensation for their negative energy that I've had to endure.

One of the best things about window cleaning is that you don't have to put with idiots.  As soon as idiotic behavior begins, you have to nip it in the bud.  Otherwise they start to think they are the boss and demand all sorts of stupid things, like respect.

Of course their the boss 
You honestly think you are doing THEM the favor?

No, they are the customer.

Fraid not. If every "customer" clicked their fingers and told you to eff off, your screwed! In fact, that's worse than a boss as you wouldn't have a leg to stand on if they all chucked you.

[ben M]

Your first mistake was to say sorry for being on holiday.
Your second was to try and justify it by saying its your first in 5 years.
Your final mistake was to allow her to keep complaining after you had explained the situation.
Window cleaning can be soul destroying enough at times without having to put up with customers like that.

+1

[8weekly]

I allow customers 30 seconds of whinging time PER YEAR.

If they exceed it they are instantly dumped, or have their prices increased by such a ridiculous amount that
A) they cancel
B) they agree and I'm laughing all the way to the bank, with the extra cash as compensation for their negative energy that I've had to endure.

One of the best things about window cleaning is that you don't have to put with idiots.  As soon as idiotic behavior begins, you have to nip it in the bud.  Otherwise they start to think they are the boss and demand all sorts of stupid things, like respect.

Of course their the boss 
You honestly think you are doing THEM the favor?

No, they are the customer.

Fraid not. If every "customer" clicked their fingers and told you to eff off, your screwed! In fact, that's worse than a boss as you wouldn't have a leg to stand on if they all chucked you.

By your reckoning I am boss of Tesco. 

[C o z y]

My pensioners are the best customers I have always pay on time
always friendly and thankyou for the service,always tip at xmas
plus I get loads of cakes  and home made jams and other preserves

Ive got one old dear who has a jar of home made  jam and a sponge
cake ready for me every six weeks when I clean her windows

I've had old dears like that in the past, all died   Got the odd nice old bird now, but no sponge cakes etc any more.   These custies make the day lovely, and you don't see it as work. Some of our over 70's have a wicked sense of humour sometimes. Dirty old women eh  

[capn sparkle]

I was out collecting one night... Chatting to this old dear when some bloke came strolling along the alleyway between the houses.

Me "Do you realise someones coming up your back passage!"

Her  Winked at me and said "Not for some time sonny"

Must have been 90 at least - Old Dears gotta love 'em