[SeanK]

I don't know if im depressed, not been to the doc or ever spoke about it. if I am its not as bad as what some have described , I find myself sitting in the van a lot smoking  and il say to myself just one more fAg and il get started. sometimes I don't get started other times I pull myself together and do a half decent days work. I know something is wrong as earnings are slipping as im not completing all my work.
 I don't fully understand depression and like I said not sure if I suffer or not, but on the whole im a happy person at home and look after my children without trouble or complaint. il add that the smoking thing is a secret, don't smoke at home and other half don't know about it which I suppose is weired for a grown man to keep secret.

all the best to all that have shared on this subject

steve

I would say that your just fed up, window cleaning can be very monotonous work and it can also be very lonely work.
I know some on here would say well if your lonely then employ, but if your not making enough money because your not
focused then you wont be in the position to employ.
Another problem is that some people just don't take to being self employed, they can work fine for other people but
struggle to self motivate.
Not an expert but I would say if you where suffering from depression it would follow you home as I don't think its
something you just experience while out working.

[rosskesava]

I don't know if im depressed, not been to the doc or ever spoke about it. if I am its not as bad as what some have described , I find myself sitting in the van a lot smoking  and il say to myself just one more fAg and il get started. sometimes I don't get started other times I pull myself together and do a half decent days work. I know something is wrong as earnings are slipping as im not completing all my work.
 I don't fully understand depression and like I said not sure if I suffer or not, but on the whole im a happy person at home and look after my children without trouble or complaint. il add that the smoking thing is a secret, don't smoke at home and other half don't know about it which I suppose is weired for a grown man to keep secret.

all the best to all that have shared on this subject

steve

That sounds like me some days and I don't think it has anything to do with proper depression. I also don't think it's that unusual and for myself I put it down to laziness which isn't a beat yourself up type of thing. Personally, I think laziness is very natural - well it is for me. Either it's that or good old fashioned and very common procrastination which is still not a beat yourself up over type of thing. I don't think that any pulling together of yourself is needed. What I do now is to open the van door without thinking about it and get out and start doing just that one job as if I'm on remote control.

Reading this thread has been a bit of an eye opener for me. Depression, thank god, is never something I've suffered from. I know depression and the like is very real and debilitating as well as just miserable for the person suffering it and it can sometimes lead to dire consequences but I never really associated that with any who post on here. Why, I don't know. It's made me think though as you never know what is behind the mask that some people wear in front of others.

[dazmond]

I don't know if im depressed, not been to the doc or ever spoke about it. if I am its not as bad as what some have described , I find myself sitting in the van a lot smoking  and il say to myself just one more fAg and il get started. sometimes I don't get started other times I pull myself together and do a half decent days work. I know something is wrong as earnings are slipping as im not completing all my work.
 I don't fully understand depression and like I said not sure if I suffer or not, but on the whole im a happy person at home and look after my children without trouble or complaint. il add that the smoking thing is a secret, don't smoke at home and other half don't know about it which I suppose is weired for a grown man to keep secret.

all the best to all that have shared on this subject

steve

sounds awful steve.i used to do that years ago when 100% trad.smoking,usually hungover,work well behind schedule,earnings suffering etc,etc.

i must admit ive not sat in the van longer than 30 mins(lunch)for a long long time.

i no longer smoke or drink.im a lot fitter than i was in my 20s-30s and lots of work to clean.

in fact i struggle to stay in the van 30 mins for lunch as im itching to get back at it after 20 mins!

ive come full circle and i put it down to a few things

1.clean,healthier lifestyle

2.WFP

3.round software.i always have a schedule for the day and 99% of the time i stick to it and complete it.

ive just got a very strong drive and self motivation.i love earning the money and being out in the fresh air.seeing customers and generally being out and about.

in fact im at the other end of the scale now as i dont like taking a day off if ive got work due!

[andyM]

I don't know if im depressed, not been to the doc or ever spoke about it. if I am its not as bad as what some have described , I find myself sitting in the van a lot smoking  and il say to myself just one more fAg and il get started. sometimes I don't get started other times I pull myself together and do a half decent days work. I know something is wrong as earnings are slipping as im not completing all my work.
 I don't fully understand depression and like I said not sure if I suffer or not, but on the whole im a happy person at home and look after my children without trouble or complaint. il add that the smoking thing is a secret, don't smoke at home and other half don't know about it which I suppose is weired for a grown man to keep secret.

all the best to all that have shared on this subject

steve

I would say that you are probably just a secret smoker.
There was a similar case on TV years ago where a man would creep downstairs and indulge his secret hidden lemonade drinking.
He was addicted to R White's?.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hro4AdTYiTA

[dazmond]

I don't know if im depressed, not been to the doc or ever spoke about it. if I am its not as bad as what some have described , I find myself sitting in the van a lot smoking  and il say to myself just one more fAg and il get started. sometimes I don't get started other times I pull myself together and do a half decent days work. I know something is wrong as earnings are slipping as im not completing all my work.
 I don't fully understand depression and like I said not sure if I suffer or not, but on the whole im a happy person at home and look after my children without trouble or complaint. il add that the smoking thing is a secret, don't smoke at home and other half don't know about it which I suppose is weired for a grown man to keep secret.

all the best to all that have shared on this subject

steve

I would say that you are probably just a secret smoker.
There was a similar case on TV years ago where a man would creep downstairs and indulge his secret hidden lemonade drinking.
He was addicted to R White's?.........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hro4AdTYiTA

made me laugh!

[Tom White]

I'm just reading this book about depression:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Shoot-Damn-Dog-Memoir-Depression/dp/0747572453

It's pretty good; really enjoying it.  I don't suffer with depression, but I have to cope with some miserable gimps and this helps give me an insight.

But it'd probably be more use for those who suffer with depression.

(Just joking about the 'miserable gimps' thing; now chin up and pull yourself together).

No really, the book is good.  I'm an alcoholic - so I've not been the epitome of stability myself - however alcoholics are the Elite when it comes to mental health problems.

Thanks for letting me share.

[Xtremely Clean]

I'm just reading this book about depression:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Shoot-Damn-Dog-Memoir-Depression/dp/0747572453

It's pretty good; really enjoying it.  I don't suffer with depression, but I have to cope with some miserable gimps and this helps give me an insight.

But it'd probably be more use for those who suffer with depression.

(Just joking about the 'miserable gimps' thing; now chin up and pull yourself together).

No really, the book is good.  I'm an alcoholic - so I've not been the epitome of stability myself - however alcoholics are the Elite when it comes to mental health problems.

Thanks for letting me share.

I'll have a look at that book thanks tosh 

[*Hector*]

you got an email address that I can contact you on Clarkey?

[Xtremely Clean]

you got an email address that I can contact you on Clarkey?

robert.clarke80@live.co.uk
Thanks hector 

[slap bash]

I am a diabetic and due to  nerve damage and  medication I do suffer with depression and do not cope very well with stress. After many years of high power businessman, its very difficult to accepting being unable to cope. People seam to think you have not brains and are some type of fool if you have depression. All one needs from folk is respect and not a being patronized. A patronizing attitude can leave one feeling more useless than ever.

[Xtremely Clean]

I am a diabetic and due to  nerve damage and  medication I do suffer with depression and do not cope very well with stress. After many years of high power businessman, its very difficult to accepting being unable to cope. People seam to think you have not brains and are some type of fool if you have depression. All one needs from folk is respect and not a being patronized. A patronizing attitude can leave one feeling more useless than ever.

I'm at a point now where I've stopped caring what people think I've had to get that attitude as I was getting down all the time thinking I was letting them down when really it was the other way around

[slap bash]

That`s the point I have reached.

[Tom White]

I am a diabetic and due to  nerve damage and  medication I do suffer with depression and do not cope very well with stress. After many years of high power businessman, its very difficult to accepting being unable to cope. People seam to think you have not brains and are some type of fool if you have depression. All one needs from folk is respect and not a being patronized. A patronizing attitude can leave one feeling more useless than ever.

It's commonly known that Winston Churchill suffered with depression - he called it his 'black dog' - and many consider him to be one of Britain's finest.

I also think attitudes towards mental health problems are changing.  People are more open about them, there's less stigma, and there's help out there.  I'm always open about my alcoholism - I am not ashamed of who I am - and I've rarely ever had any negative feedback (maybe once); but that was their problem, not mine (my Mum mostly; she thinks alkies are worthless scum who deserve to die in gutters  ).

I liked the book I recommended because the lady was a 'seeker'; she put some effort into her recovery and looked in many different places for help.  I think that's important; what may help one particular individual, may not help another.  She even looked for help and advice from recovered alcoholics and Buddhism (which can be a psychiatry, rather than a religion).

There's a shed load of books on the subject of both depression and happiness; happiness is definitely a skill and not purely dependant on how much we've got in our bank accounts, how pretty our wife is, how big our house is, what clothes we wear (etc).  In fact many people who've got all these things in abundance still commit suicide.

Anyway, I'm getting off the point; my point is that your perception of what people think of depression and what you think people think about people who suffer with depression could be two different things.

[Tom White]

Oh, just to add, it was once pointed out to me that if I'm having suicidal thoughts, that means I'm suicidal.  That's all there is to it (I thought there was more  ).

If that's the case, some really good advice is to see your GP.  There's nothing wrong with happy pills - they can help get someone to a more even keel - so they can find a proper long-term solution.  Your GP can also refer you to counselling and some other stuff, like mindfulness courses.

The thing about suicide is that it's just a bit final.  An A.A. cliche is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

[Xtremely Clean]

Oh, just to add, it was once pointed out to me that if I'm having suicidal thoughts, that means I'm suicidal.  That's all there is to it (I thought there was more  ).

If that's the case, some really good advice is to see your GP.  There's nothing wrong with happy pills - they can help get someone to a more even keel - so they can find a proper long-term solution.  Your GP can also refer you to counselling and some other stuff, like mindfulness courses.

The thing about suicide is that it's just a bit final.  An A.A. cliche is that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

I think keeping that hope is key lose hope and it gets dangerous I know as I was there earlier this year, luckily for me I did have my mam to help me through it and believe me I've put her through the mill in the past.

[Tom White]

Spot on, Clarkey, without hope, we're hopeless! 

Here, this guy always usually gives some good advice; don't be put off by what he's wearing - there's nothing 'woo woo' about what he says:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fixvb3s25Uk&list=PL8BBF1F6213CE8C48

[*Hector*]

email sent to you Clarkey.

[Tom White]

i no longer smoke or drink.im a lot fitter than i was in my 20s-30s and lots of work to clean.

Can I just point out that I know someone very well who regularly runs marathons and is fit as a butcher's dog, yet suffers with depression.

Health and well-being don't automatically go together.  We can be very healthy, but not well in our being.  But we can be unhealthy - ill even - and yet be well in our being.

Well-being is, however, possible in all circumstances.

This person says that exercise helps with their depression though.

[Xtremely Clean]

i no longer smoke or drink.im a lot fitter than i was in my 20s-30s and lots of work to clean.

'
Can I just point out that I know someone very well who regularly runs marathons and is fit as a butcher's dog, yet suffers with depression.

Health and well-being don't automatically go together.  We can be very healthy, but not well in our being.  But we can be unhealthy - ill even - and yet be well in our being.

Well-being is, however, possible in all circumstances.

This person says that exercise helps with their depression though.

Exercise definitely does help me I'm at gym tonight withmy gf, iI was at gym regularly in last few months but slacked off due to tennis elbow, in hindsight I should of just done cardio bike, treadmill etc

[Stoots]

Funny how many people suffer with depression. I have suffered for as long as i remember with depression, anxiety, panic attacks and ocd. I have been on and off pills since a teenager, tried all sorts of therapy. im 32 now. It got to an all time low when my ex left me about a year ago, i had several visits to  A&E with suspected heart attacks which i know to be panic attacks, lost my kids and my home ended up back at my parents. I know what its like to get up everyday and just being stuck in your head, thoughts going round and round. even to this day tears come easily, im very emotional and easily angry or upset.

BUT im convinced having gone through all this pain i will become such a strong individual that i will succeed greatly in my self employed journey, ive only just begun but i cannot explain the drive and will to survive being at the bottom of the barrell produces. It goes back to that survival instinct, each day i feel bad now i listen to motivational stuff and remind myself this pain is building my character that people who havent experienced the torment of depression cannot dream of growing as strong as i can.

Depression is a f***ing horrible affliction, but use it, draw from the pain, every tear, every tormented though, use it. we only grow through pain, if you can survive depression you can do ANYTHING