[peter holley]

I honestly believe that some people project themselves as a victim - I am not saying this to offend any one or that they in any way choose or deserve to be a victim.
I cannot say why it is so but it is.
I have a suggestion that  often works, if your daughter is interested try and get her into a drama group / school  it really builds self confidence and subsequently self confident children tend not to get bullied.
My daughter now 20 and is only 4'9 tall and always been into drama singing etc. she was super confident even as a  three years old.
Luckly she never suffered from bullying but many of the kids that joined the various drama groups, stage schools etc. she was in as a very young child had and that is why their parents encoraged them to join - as their confidence grew the bullying faded.

last weekshe tookpart in a school production of high school musical....she had to dance and sing infront of hundreds, and through this she has met other freinds, but she seems to get singled out,but i agree that she needs to have more self confidence...

[michael papworth]

.theres no answer to the problem of bullying.....

Can't quite agree with this, I'm afraid.

I'd agree to: "There's no answer to the problem of bullies."

There is an answer to the problems that they cause for the bullied. There are two possible answers.

1 - Find out what it is about your personality/behaviour that invites bullies to pick on you and change it.

2 - Don't give a rat's ass about the nasty low-life bullies and just go about your life as if they don't exist. They usually lose interest and go and pick on someone else.

[davids3511]

.theres no answer to the problem of bullying.....

Can't quite agree with this, I'm afraid.

I'd agree to: "There's no answer to the problem of bullies."

There is an answer to the problems that they cause for the bullied. There are two possible answers.

1 - Find out what it is about your personality/behaviour that invites bullies to pick on you and change it.

2 - Don't give a rat's ass about the nasty low-life bullies and just go about your life as if they don't exist. They usually lose interest and go and pick on someone else.

Yeah great, but how do you explain this to a 12 year old girl?

[michael papworth]

.theres no answer to the problem of bullying.....

Can't quite agree with this, I'm afraid.

I'd agree to: "There's no answer to the problem of bullies."

There is an answer to the problems that they cause for the bullied. There are two possible answers.

1 - Find out what it is about your personality/behaviour that invites bullies to pick on you and change it.

2 - Don't give a rat's ass about the nasty low-life bullies and just go about your life as if they don't exist. They usually lose interest and go and pick on someone else.

Yeah great, but how do you explain this to a 12 year old girl?

I've taught hundreds of girls and boys of this age. Most of them are perfectly well able to understand the ideas.

If you REALLY want to know how to apply the ideas, email me and we can talk.

[s.w.c]

this is a interesting thread as my 8 year old had some verbal bullying when he moved to his new school, since he is the smallest kid there he takes after his mum even his younger brother age 5 is bigger than him, its hard to no which way too deal with these problems, Ive talked to my boy as much as i can about this Ive just started to teach him to fight but with what i know in the way of fighting an self defence its hard not to show him some real devastating moves but I'm trying to keep it simple ish as i don't want him beating the crap out of them and getting a big head and becoming the bully as i hate bully's, in 14years on the doors i hate bully's and like to bully a bully sad i know but to me back then it was fun Ive seen 45 year old bully's in the pubs, schools hands are a little tied up these days its hard for them to deal with bully's as the kids these days start on the teachers, we had the cane back in my days once you had that a few times you sort of learnt a little or the local bobby would come to see you near end of school and you would get a clip around the head or worse, they use to carry i heavy wooden truncheon and it hurt, but those days are long gone, well hope it all works out well for anyone in this world of kids being bully-ed at school, i don't know if what I'm doing with my son is right but its the only way i know how to deal with it.

[Ian W]

I reckon you are doing the right thing Smithy.

I am no fighter and got bullied badly throughout my school years. I was about 15 and one of the bullies just got to me and I took a swing at him. Never had a problem after that...  :

Bullied kids should be taught SELF DEFENCE in my opinion. The world seems to be getting more violent and I can only imagine what it might be like in a few years time.

[matt]

its anti bully week this week aswell

[s.w.c]

yea hate to think of the future for our kids its spiraling out of control, i too once had a experience with a bully when i was 13 it was only one boy all he kept doing each day was trying to get me to fight back and at that time i wouldn't this is what fueled him and he kept on, this went on for nearly a year then i saw the red mist he wishes it never happened and guess what i got suspended from school for a while, this was the start of a bad streak in me to this day i wish i never found that streak in me it caused me some much trouble in my younger years even got me sent to a boys home, then later on in life it caused me to see the inside of a prison, then of coarse because i became a violent sh*t it then attracted some unsavory friends this then became a world of naughty behavior from violence to drugs then to the world of being a bouncer, sometimes i wish things where different for me but i learnt a lot along this path, then i had kids and my life changed and i changed with it, due to my past its hard to try bring your kids up in a sensible way, i'm glad i also became a window cleaner as this has helped me change my ways to a honest living and as a result of these changes in my life its helped me become a better person and father, still have the mist but i have learnt to control it better over the years, as a moral to this story is i had never had that bully years ago would i have been the way i was, see bullying can have a long term effect on you when your young, so it needs to be handled with care.
ps. taff just send a army of sheep into the school lol.

[spark1]

My son was getting bullied by one boy who was bit of a tuff nut ,this was going on for 3 months.

My wife and i said the normal stuff said we would talk to teachers but my son said no way.

I took my son to one side and told him to hit him next time but make sure you do a proper job no softly softly , and explained to him that he might get up and return the favour.

Anyway the day came and my son did loose it and did a proper job.He hit him and he fell over so he hit him again ,made the boy cry in front of everyone .

The wife went mad at me for the advice i gave him

Then we got a phone call from headmaster say can we come in .
so we did and he said he given are son a dt but not to worry because he knew something was going on from some other complaints about this boy and hes written a letter to the boys parents warning them that he might be suspended.

He never got bullied again.