arrrr roight, am with ya now ted, a mean mat.
why not for a laugh, put..... "carpet cleaning, one pound" yes thats right ladies and gentlemen, for £1 we will clean any room, with discounts for more rooms"
that way you can actually see if your web site is being viewed by potential custies.
don't worry if you do get a call, just tell them you went out of business for being too cheap.