[ollie]

I have just received the new yellowpages for my area and am concerned my main competitor has aquired a time machine
Last year he was established 14 years and this year he has been established for 18 years.     Does anyone know which of the major manufactuers produce these machines and at what price?  I am concerned he will travel to the future and ruin my reputation before i get there.
Regards
Ollie

[John Kelly]

This kind of thing happens all the time. This country has the most lax consumer and business protection in the developed world.
I saw one recently which said cleaning carpets for 20 years. The 2 guys had been cleaning for ten years each.

[Mike Halliday]

last year was a leap year that's where the extra 4yrs came from

I hate it when people lie about how long they've been in business to try and get more credibility, this never happened in the 60s when i started my business 

Mike

[Phil Marlor]

 

Phil

[stains-away]

I have just received the new yellowpages for my area and am concerned my main competitor has aquired a time machine
Last year he was established 14 years and this year he has been established for 18 years. Does anyone know which of the major manufactuers produce these machines and at what price? I am concerned he will travel to the future and ruin my reputation before i get there.
Regards
Ollie

I wouldnt want a time machine that only adds 4 years experience, not when you can get 1 that adds 13 years like we have in Norfolk  ;   Andy

[ValueValeting]

This kind of thing happens all the time. This country has the most lax consumer and business protection in the developed world.
I saw one recently which said cleaning carpets for 20 years. The 2 guys had been cleaning for ten years each.

I've seen computer companies advertise themselves with over 70 years of experience.... :

[ollie]

As well as that ,in my local yellow pages, ive just found an illegal user of the NCCA logo, Chem dry red dragon from Llandovery. I thought chem dry  franchise owners did ok without having to lie. listen to his "free consumer info line" at 08006950287 you may as well its free. He tells us about how bad all methods are apart from their carbonated method. And again he mentions the NCCA   ..T**T
Regards
Ollie

[stains-away]

In fairness he doesnt say they are members of the ncca or iicrc, he just says that customers should ask if a cc is a member and I couldnt see any reference to the ncca on his website,although not being in your area I havent seen his yp ad.
I particularly like the way he rambles on about tobacco smoke being walked in on your shoes, considering the amount of crap your shoes come into contact with during the average day I wouldve thought that treading on some b&h fumes was the least of my worries
And remember folks,hwe shrinks your carpets whilst hwe with carbonated water doesnt,time to add a heater eliment to that sodastream me thinks, Andy

[ollie]

If he can get away with his ad in my local yellow pages, im going to stop my monthly payment for my NCCA membership. Its a joke , he knows he will be invited to join, so he will carry on until he gets prosecuted. This has really made me mad... he will still get custom from people looking for NCCA members but without paying. He should get made to tell the public hes not a member when they phone his carbon promotion line!!

[stains-away]

That phone message, along with several others I've heard are a brilliant tool I think,not for getting customers but for playing with your phone set to conference, saves reading the kids a bedtime story

[ollie]

lol...a very far fetched fairy tale!!

[stains-away]

Once upon a time in a land of carbonated water...................

[garyj]

I think he should be congratulated on using up some extra carbon. If we all started putting a few extra carbon molecules in our own water we would be able to help stop global warming. I'm going to get a jam jar full tomorrow and add it to my tank.

Where can I get the cleanest carbon from, if I get it from my front garden it will be a bit dirty from  the traffic and might effect the quality of my cleans, shall I go and climb a tree or will I just end up scooping up more oxygen than necessary. 

[stains-away]

The best time to get the purist carbon is on a rainy night, you will need a high powered torch and a tupperware tub with air holes in the lid....or was that worms

[garyj]

I'm not sure either Andy, I'll phone the NCCA  ( National Carbon Collectors Association ) tomorrow and find out.

[stains-away]

The iicrc (institute of insane carbon in the rain collectors) may also be able to help, Andy

[garyj]

Ollie, I expect if you complained he would win anyway.

He is using the carbonated dating method and it has been shown to be very accurate, far more accurate than just using water. 

[carpetclean]

I have just received the new yellowpages for my area and am concerned my main competitor has aquired a time machine
Last year he was established 14 years and this year he has been established for 18 years.     Does anyone know which of the major manufactuers produce these machines and at what price?  I am concerned he will travel to the future and ruin my reputation before i get there.
Regards
Ollie

prehaps he is a cat!?