[AuRavelling79]

On Thursday I'm cleaning 5 out of a terrace of 7 1960's houses. Parking is across about 20 yards of grass with separate blocks of garages and so I park up then run hose to each house.

So I don't bother knocking and do all the top fronts and am working back along the bottoms. I notice a funeral cortege turn up and go over, move my cones and hose to let them pull up and carry on.

Five minutes later I'm cleaning the lounge window and in the reflection I see a top hatted, morning coated funeral director walk up to the front path.

Gold: "You coming here?"
TopHat: "Errr this is No 14 isn't it?"
Gold: "Yes but I don't know if anyones home ..."
TopHat (grinning but speaking quietly) "I hope so, can't keep the deceased waiting ..."
Gold: " I'll make myself scarce"
(Leg it and frantically start pulling 50 metres of microbore away from the front path and out of the way of the funeral cars as my custy and family walk towards the coffin)

What is it with me and the dearest departed? This is the same road as I had my infamous falling out with the Polish gent who told me his wife was dead when I got antsy about taking him back on as a customer!

 

[Spruce]

You need to start carrying a few 'Where are the dead?' booklets in your pocket. 

[Steve Sed]

... Or chant "bring out your dead" as you pull the hose up the street.

[DaveG]

Did they pay?

[pncleaning]

Thats why sometimes its a good idea to knock before you start cleaning 

[Ian Lancaster]

Back in the early 90's (I'm beginning to soundlike Uncle Albert ) I used to do a complex of old folks sheltered housing.  In one particluarly bad winter it seemed every visit another one or two had popped their clogs.

I gave them all a memo:

"Please note there has been an unacceptably high incidence of departure from this mortal coil.  This has caused me much inconvenience so in future I must insist that anyone considering dying must first fill out the attached application form in triplicate and allow me at least one visit's worth of notice".

I should mention I had been doing the block for several years, knew all of them by first names and was always having a laugh with them.

[AuRavelling79]

Did they pay?

 

No I put one of my slips through with a note which said:

"Sorry about my impeccable timing, have this one on me!" with a smiley face!

It was a "front only" so I think I did the right thing!

[DaveG]

Did they pay?

 

No I put one of my slips through with a note which said:

"Sorry about my impeccable timing, have this one on me!" with a smiley face!

It was a "front only" so I think I did the right thing!

Nice touch... I had a picture in my head of you standing there like a hotel porter waiting for your money