Clean It Up
UK Floor Cleaning Forum => Carpet Cleaning Forum => Topic started by: cleanability on April 19, 2008, 10:09:29 pm
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One question which I find really funny is......I finish a job and they ask " Can I or when can I give it clean with my vacuum cleaner" lollllllllllllll I've just given this "The Most Thorough Clean Ever" as i state in my advert and they want to hoover it when i finish lollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
Chris
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Do you want paying now? :o
Shaun
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Is cash alright
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I cleaned a house today for a Asian family at one point there were 7 adults and 2 kids playing football in a 12x12 bedroom I was trying to clean , are we getting in your way?
John
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Lady aked today, would the water go through the floor and into the flat below. :P
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How about............Can you give me a quote ?
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as you get out of your signwritten van "do you clean carpets?"
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Are the carpets left wet or damp?
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After cleaning some seriously oily carpets on a tug boat with the truckmount, one of the crew says it's not as good as the vax is it :o
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My brother in law has one of these machines!
Well why isnt he cleaning it?
or when quoting: ow its more than its is to hire a machine from homebase!
What do they expect
John
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Q How much to do a flood ?
Ans
Lets start at a million and discount down shall we !!!!
OR
Q Well the carpets were not that dirty
Ans
You rang me !!!
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The last bloke managed to get an iron mark out :-\
S
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Can i pay you now ???
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can i give your number to my friend?
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Is it chemical free cleaning ?......... is my fave at the mo :o
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Having done the quotation and now gone to the van to bring my equipment in:
"You're not going to bring that into my house are you?"
(What I wish I'd said in reply), "No Madam, I'm going to lick your carpet clean!" ;D
Or, when looking at a plain,light coloured wool carpet:
"It's only children's paint. I've tried lots of things without success so I called you in."
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"its only surface dirt"
"how much for cash"
or when you ask the customer what type of material is her suite made of she says"normal upholster fabric"
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or normal room size after!
After I've said that there are so many different rooms sizes that there is no such thing as a 'normal room size'
Shaun
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Someone said recently, that they wanted an idea of cost to clean average sized dining room ............ last 4 dining rooms i had done, prior to that, were all 110-115 sq metres each ......... would have frightened the life out of her ;D
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I have an old lady that rings me up occassionally, she's a bit far away to just fit her in but the conversation goes "how much to clean my porch carpet 6ft x 4ft?, it's not very big and I want a good job done, can you come today, and I can replace it for a £10", she rings about every 2 months, I have told her that it's cheaper to replace if £10 is all it will cost and that I can't do it straight away.
She probably due to call soon.
Shaun
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its only tea, and thats only hair dye, emolsion paint..... it'll just rinse out
OK YOU GET IT OUT THEN!!!!!!!!
PEASANTS!
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Call...
I have a few stains that need to get out
Ok, I will be there tomorrow (30 miles away)
get there
thanks for coming, my dog has peed all over the place and I can't seem to get them out
Ah...
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When the kitchen is a pig stye and they ask "would you like a cup of tea?"
Er, my tongue feels like the bottom of a parrots cage but think I'll give it a miss ;D
Or when you get a tip and they give it to you like its an underhand 'deal', and they put a pound in your hand ::) God bless em.
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how would you like to be paid,,,,, that will depend on the custy young fit or old and fat ??????????
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When quoting over the phone
Q" Can you tell me what type of carpet it is?"
A "Yes its white" ???
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Can you give me a price to clean my lounge carpet,ok madam how big is your lounge roughly ?
er i don`t know,well rough idea in feet,er i don`t know.Ok then lets say it`s 18x12 that comes out at £67 oh ok i have had it done twice before once it was £50 and once it was £65 ok then i said i will do it for £65,
can you do it today ! no sorry booked up all today,well when can you do it ?
when is good for you ? Monday or friday , sorry booked up .
Can you do wed , yes thank f@@k for that
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1/ Sorry there's no hot water, but I can put the kettle on!!! Might need more than a cup of hot water!
2/ Pass me your bucket, i'll fill it. They return with it half full, which knackers the product dilution.
3/ They see me pull up in a large LWB Transit. "You can put your CAR on the driveway".
4/ Booking a job in (To actually do the work), turning up and giving the price only to be told "Yes thats fine, when can you do it".
Could go on. ;D
Peter
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Or travel 20 miles for 8 in the morning and be greeted by a lass in her dressing gown who says- Not another one, I have someone who keeps ordering stuff and last week it was an undertaker at 3 in the morning and yesterday a chimney sweep. -- Thats one who didn't get charged a cancellation fee.
Trevor
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Its a shame you couldnt get that coffee stain out, I'll have a go with the 1001.
Its only five years old so its definately not wear.
Its really only the arms that need cleaned.
Is there a discount if you dont clean the back and sides as there not dirty.
And the worst of all.............................................
Its definately a good quality carpet the salesman said so............yes its knowen as a Belgium Wilton madam.
Mark
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The carpet has been down 30 years. I had cleaned 15 years ago and it came up like new. Will it be the same this time?
If you can't get the stain out, will I need to pay you?
I don't believe in carpet cleaning, it takes all the stuffing out of the carpets.
How much do I owe you? (Holding your written quote)
Do you mind working around the plumber/electrician/heating engineer/decorator?